let there be light: an essay on priorities.

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[Credit: Laugh Graph]

I am a reform Jew.  I was born a reform Jew to two Jewish parents.  I attended sunday school, Hebrew school, was bat mitzvahed and confirmed.  I spent a number of years on the board for my local youth group and three very solid, life-altering years highly involved in my region of NFTY (North American Federation of [reform] Temple Youth).  This will always be a defining part of who I am.

The most important part of Judaism is the value of community.  It is a support system that is unlike anything else I have ever had.  When there is an event in the community, everyone is there.  A birth, a death, a $200,000 fundraiser for a stem-cell transplant; we hold each other up, without question.  I have always been proud of my background and my religion and consider myself extremely lucky to be born into such a community.

However, I have found myself questioning religion a lot lately.  This process actually began a little under a year ago when I went through that phase of a break-up where I was trying to figure out what I could have done differently (an irrelevant and completely unproductive rumination process).  I made my way to wondering if it had something to do with our difference in opinion about how we would prefer to religiously raise our children.  Oddly enough, the ridiculous thoughts actually lead to a purpose: a reevaluation of my priorities.

The fact of the matter is that it doesn't matter what religion my children are raised.  They will see both parents' lifestyles and they will hopefully learn about both of those, as well as others out there.  The important part is that my children will be raised with good values as a human being.  Whether or not they believe that Jesus saves, or that there is a day when God writes down who will die that year - and how - and seals it a week later really only dulls in comparison to the importance of how they treat other people and how they are going to change the world.  We are all raised with some religious information, be it that there is no god or there are 40 gods.  Besides, we all know that we reach a point - typically around the teen years - when we begin to question the meaning that has in our lives.  Teenagers are smart; they reevaluate, they discover, they customize, they "rebel," and they eventually fall into their own beliefs.

The Torah has become a book of fables to me.  It is my tradition and history, but so is The Little Mermaid.  I once believed in Ariel, too.  You can laugh, but there is no difference between the truth in her and the truth in the Easter Bunny.  It was enjoyable, but I have slowly been outgrowing those stories over time.  I still love hearing them like I love listening to Greek myths and other religions' beliefs, but i will not personally base my lifestyle around them.

We know so much more nowadays that may or may not back up stories from the Old Testament.  If someone tells you God spoke to them via burning bush, they will most likely be considered clinically insane or tripping balls.  There have been far greater medical mysteries than the stories that people come up with about the biblical days.  Women become pregnant when they are told they're barren.  They also lie and cheat; I'd love to hear a woman tell her husband that it must be "the son of God."  Good luck, honey.

So, what do I believe?  I believe that "God" is not a giant old man designing our universe, but more a force of nature, like gravity.  Maybe [my] god is gravity.  It keeps the world in motion and it keeps a balance.  I believe what goes around comes around and karma is a bitch.  I believe everything happens for a reason and we decide our own fate.  We invite what comes into our lives; if you are always negative, you will only bring negativity in.  I believe that the world population was not intended to be "every man for himself" and that people are supposed to connect and protect each other.  I believe pain and suffering is necessary to learn and grow and that if we cannot learn to let go of the emotional toxins in our lives, those toxins will manifest themselves in a physical manor.  I believe in doing what you love or getting out.

Yes, there are limitations to some of these, as there are with all things, but these are the values that I base my lifestyle on.  I only get one life (at a time) and the only people that I owe any words of thanks and praise to are those who have first- (or even second-) handedly impacted my life, myself included.

I don't know what the universe came from or where it's going.  I have no idea what happens in "the afterlife".  I have learned to trust without the answers.  I feel more comfortable not knowing than I do with what others make up based on what they want to believe.  I can respect that many people find comfort in having answers, even if they are unofficial, but I cannott live without truth.  It is the year 2oo8 5769.  We have so much more to do with our lives than prepare for what happens next, when no one even has proof of what that is.  What a damn waste.  I am down with the here and now.

I am a reform Jew.  I will take every Jewish value I have learned with me for the rest of my life, but my faith lies in the moment.  In this moment, I believe I have more historical connection to a tadpole than I have ever had to a man's rib.

Please read before commenting: This is a personal blog that strictly covers my personal opinion.  I respect that everyone has their own beliefs and, in return, expect mine to be respected, as well.  I would never try to force my opinions on anyone else.  This entry was not intended to offend anyone.