Saturday, March 30, 2013

in lieu of flowers.

My father, as many of you already know, passed away exactly three weeks and 24 hours ago of a disease he lived with for 8½ years. (In fact, here's the earliest post I have on this blog about it.) I won't go into all of the details because many of you have already seen everything on Facebook or heard through other mediums, and this is not the point of this post tonight.

The point of this post is to show you something really amazing that we received in the mail today.

Saturday, February 09, 2013

shout out to Sex+.

I spend a lot of time on the "interwebs." Like, a lot a lot. And when you spend so much time online, you get to know the people of the internet and perhaps, occasionally, start to crush on a few of them. This is about one of my internet crushes.

Her name is Laci Green and she runs a blog/YouTube channel based on her education project Sex+. She's got a passion for sex/gender studies and she knows her shit. She's body-positive, sex-positive and not afraid to dig up the deepest "taboos" (which is great, because someone's gotta). She answers all the questions people are afraid to ask and manages to do so in an extremely eloquent and well-organized manner in under 4 minutes.

If you watch nothing else of hers, take 4 minutes to watch the following video on fat-shaming. It's Eating Disorder Awareness Month and if you do nothing else for the rest of the month, I only ask that you watch this video for less than 5 minutes of your life. Fat-shaming -- weight-shaming -- needs to stop. Thanks to our fantastic, all-inclusive weight-obsessed society, fat-shaming affects each and every one of us on a daily basis whether you realize it or not. So do me a favor. Do yourself a favor, for the sake of raising awareness, and listen up.

Saturday, January 26, 2013

1 week down, 14 to go.

It's totally the extended version.
Yesterday afternoon concluded my first official week of the Spring '13 semester, the first week of my second semester at FSU. This semester is clearly going to go a little differently than the last, as I image they all will from here on out. I've never been on this side -- the second-half side -- of a degree before. Rumor has it classes just get harder from here. Guess that makes sense.

I am actually pretty excited about this semester. I finally feel like I'm taking courses that are moving me through the program, now that I'm mostly taking Major requirements. I actually feel like I'm going somewhere for the first time since I started taking night courses about three and a half years ago.

Friday, January 18, 2013

"careful the things you say, children will listen."

"OY, would you just look at the waist on her? You're so lucky to be so skinny!" The number of times I heard this line in any number of variations as a child would be impossible to estimate. I got it from family members, my parents' friends, and completely random women in grocery and department stores. I heard it constantly.

The earliest I can recall someone telling me how lucky I was to be skinny is at least elementary school-aged, somewhere between 5-9. Yes, I was a child. I was an innocent, fairly healthy and active child who ate macaroni & cheese and peanut butter & jelly sandwiches as my mother put them in front of me. I was picky, but the way I looked wasn't even a concept in my head. Food was for nourishment and I was taught to eat it 3-6 times a day as my mother gave it to me. But I was apparently very lucky to be so skinny, according to everyone.

I didn't know that was meant as a compliment (and why should it be?). When I heard I was lucky to be skinny, that meant skinny was good, ideal, something everyone should aim to be. And I was there, so... success! It meant that to be something other than skinny was unlucky and would lower my quality of life, as you could hear it had for the women talking to me in their envious tones. It meant I had it good as long as I remained thin and tiny.

And those same women would later threateningly say, "Oh, it'll catch up with you one day." But I'd learned that was bad, so I wasn't about to let that happen.

And those same women would even later say, "Oh gosh, she's in the hospital? How sad. The media these days is just terrible."

Sunday, January 13, 2013

babies. everywhere.

I'm going to be blunt: I don't understand why people want babies.

This is not meant to offend anyone, it's not personal toward anyone (or their child), and I should point out that I have an unbelievable amount of respect for people that have children. I just can't wrap my head around why or how you're able to do it.

Having babies is necessary to our race's survival; it's what we do and it's what makes us living organisms. Blah blah blah science blah blah. But you don't usually hear lionesses walking around going, "OMG I want cubs. I want so many cubs. They're so cute and cuddly and fluffy and GOSH I hope I have a girl cub." I don't actually speak Lion, so it's possible I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure it's just more of an instinctual, animalistic (if you will) desire to reproduce. Humans are... different.

Friday, January 04, 2013

and how would you like that cooked?

twitter.com/serveritis
I'm a server, more commonly known as a "waitress," and I think it's time I respond to questions and comments such as:
"I tip, but I don't think it should be expected." "Why should I have to leave more than the total amount on my bill?" "I start the tip at 15%, then lower it every time my server does something wrong." And this guy: "I'm basically a 'no tipper.' And I'm damn proud of it."

The concept of tipping in the restaurant industry is greatly misunderstood by anyone who has never actually worked in the restaurant industry. I can understand that, to be honest. If you've never worked on server's wage, how could you possibly understand why you're being asked to contribute more than what your bill comes out to? It's a ridiculous idea.

What you need to know is $8/hour (or whatever it is in your state) is not minimum wage for every industry. I think that's where people make the biggest mistake: assuming that they're tipping on top of an hourly wage. What you probably don't know is that servers in Massachusetts only make $2.63/hr (known as "tipped minimum wage"), most of which goes to taxes at the end of the day. That is the second lowest serving wage in the United States, the lowest being $2.13/hr. And while we continue to raise the standard minimum wage, tipped minimum wage hasn't changed in 20+ years. Can you imagine the uproar that would be set off in our country if $2.63/hr was the norm in any other industry in 2013?

Tuesday, January 01, 2013

two oh one three.

Student champagne.
2012 was an incredible year for me, easily one for the books.

At the end of 2011, I was finding myself floating in Worker's Purgatory. I had a job that allowed me to live more than comfortably and had the luxury apartment I'd always wanted, but I was spending 40-50 hours/week at a desk doing work I didn't plan to spend my life doing.

At this point, I had put myself through three semesters of night school already and was moving toward my BA at a painfully slow pace. It occurred to me around the end of November that if I wanted to get my life moving in the direction I wanted, I was going to have to return to school full time. It was frustrating to think about the changes that decision would come with, though, and I wasn't ready to give up financial stability to return to being a poor college student. Lucky for me, I didn't have to make that decision. It was made for me about two weeks later. And God bless 'em.

Sunday, August 12, 2012

wearing recovery on my sleeve.

I've wanted a tattoo probably since I was about 16-years-old. I've had a lot of different ideas come through and a lot of designs I've wanted and actually still want.

When I was in treatment circa 2007, I decided that once I could deem myself "fully recovered," I wanted to get this tattoo you see here to the right. That would be my official gift to myself.

I've come to realize some people don't understand why a person would want to permanently mark themselves for any reason, so I'd like to express why this was not only incredibly important to me, but something I truly felt I needed to do.

Thursday, March 01, 2012

self-injury awareness day 2012.

Today is Self-Injury Awareness Day.

This is a true cause that needs attention brought to it as it is extremely misunderstood and often (if not always) ignored. People are aware of breast cancer 365 (366 for 2012) days a year. People are aware of juvenile diabetes. Don't get me wrong; these are both extremely important causes and I will strongly raise awareness for both (especially diabetes), but today is truly about awareness. It is about drawing attention to something people want to pretend isn't there.

Self-injury makes people uncomfortable. People prefer things that are "normal" and hurting yourself is just not normal. You have to be "crazy" to hurt yourself. You must be an "attention whore" if you're hurting yourself.

So, allow me - if you will - to take a few minutes and educate you so that we can scratch away at just a little bit of the stigma that surrounds SI so that it doesn't have to be a taboo subject. Therefore, those that suffer can get the help they need.

Why do people hurt themselves?

Monday, February 20, 2012

the real "hearing impairment": an essay.

Observations of a hearing student entering the Deaf culture.

A brief background.
For those who don't know me: I'm a hearing college student studying psychology in conjunction with Deaf culture and American Sign Language. I'm currently in ASL II. I've been fascinated by ASL since I was 10 when my Girl Scout troupe had to sign "Heal The World" by Michael Jackson. True story. I believe it was later that week that I stole my first library book (unintentionally, of course), a now-outdated ASL dictionary to start teaching myself the basics.

It was sometime around mid 2009 when I decided I would return to school to continue working on my college degree and knew that ASL had to be worked in there. Coincidentally, this was right around the time one of my best friends was pregnant with my niece that, unbeknownst to us, would end up hard of hearing due to birth complications. This, of course, only inspired me to throw myself into an already growing passion that much more.

Tuesday, January 03, 2012

book review: the compound effect.


The Compound EffectThe Compound Effect by Darren Hardy
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Going to be honest, I'm pretty sure this book was written for me.
The Compound Effect is a motivational book about what he calls - wait for it - the Compound Effect. The concept is basically to say that smaller steps over a long period of time will have a greater, more beneficial and successful effect on your life than bigger steps in a shorter period of time (that most people will not stick to). I am the type of person that gets revved up to make a change, is all-in for about a month (tops), and then I "don't have enough time," or "I'm too tired," excuse, excuse, excuse.
This book gave me such a different way to view behavior modification as well as changing life-long bad habits (of which I certainly have my fair share). Reading it just before the start of the New Year gave me a lot to think about and I have put several of his suggested methods into effect already.

I would highly recommend this book to basically everyone. Whether you're looking to change a behavior, a habit, build a business or even think that things may just be fine as they are, it's a great (very quick!) read that will really have you reevaluating the way you look at your life and considering even the smallest changes that may end up making all the difference in the long run.


View all my reviews

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

book review: love unlisted.


Love UnlistedLove Unlisted by Stephanie Haddad
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I've never really been the "chick lit" type, but this book was glued to my hand. I feel like I was very emotionally busy throughout reading it; I teared up about 4 times (this is coming from someone who cries during every episode of Grey's, so it might just be me) and was literally "LOL-ing" throughout most of the book. There were a few points where I thought for sure I had figured out a side-plot, but Stephanie Haddad would never make it so easy. I found myself second-guessing myself up until the last couple pages.

If you like contemporary romance, I would absolutely recommend this witty read. In fact, even if you're usually not (like myself), I can still guarantee you'll find yourself sucked into this book as it's impossible to not relate to the main character, Grace, and her neuroses that you don't want to admit you also have.


View all my reviews

Buy this book here.

Sunday, March 20, 2011

kindles don't kill books, people do.


I bought a Kindle about 2 weeks ago and I am in love. I didn't want an e-reader, at all. I had nothing against them, I just had no reason for one. Eventually, I discovered I actually had a lot of reasons.

People seem to have pretty strong opinions of the Kindle; you either love 'em or you hate 'em. Why is that necessary? Why would you hate an electronic? It should be that you either love 'em, or you don't own one. What's the point of hating something that no one's forcing you to even have? It's just. An object. Get over it.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

book review: room.

RoomRoom by Emma Donoghue

My rating: 3 of 5 stars


Generally speaking, "Room" is my kind of book. It takes a twisted mind to write it and an equally twisted mind to enjoy it.

Honestly, I was turned off by one particular review before I even started reading it and I would mostly say I agreed. The book is written from the perspective of a 5-year-old, so it can be very frustrating to read and I couldn't follow some things because of the grammar. I almost feel like Donoghue doesn't give 5-year-old's enough credit, but I don't spend enough time with children in that age group to truly back that up. I have to give her the benefit of the doubt and assume that, as a best-selling author, she must have done her research. There were some inconsistencies mentioned by the aforementioned reviewer, such as how Jack refers to vomit as "stuff falling out of her mouth," but then calls it vomit for the rest of the book when it's never actually explained to him. However, it didn't bother me as much.

I must admit that I was pretty impressed with Ma's creativity in all the ways she managed to teach and entertain her son in the confines of an 11x11 ft room. There were a few spots that actually had me tearing up a little, which isn't easy for an author to bring me to. For some reason, I can't bring myself to say that I "love" this book, but I can't think of too much I didn't like about it. The story was intriguing enough; especially during the "Great Escape," I seriously couldn't read fast enough. Warning: that whole chapter was insanely anxiety provoking.

If it was possible, I would give it 3.5 starts and would definitely recommend it to the right person.



View all my reviews

Thursday, January 13, 2011

identity crisis: i'm not a cancer.

I have been a Leo since 1986. I'm textbook. I'm still getting it inked. Deal with it.

(Pluto was one thing... it was a rock. Now you're just messing with the way people see themselves and an astrological connection that helps them figure out who they are. Don't people have enough problems with identity as it is?)

http://newsfeed.time.com/2011/01/13/horoscope-hang-up-earth-rotation-changes-zodiac-signs/

snowpocolypse '11.

The Great White Waltham, Circa 2010.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Sunday, January 09, 2011

i needed a scarf.


So, this is the one I started. I don't know why, but I couldn't get a picture to do it justice. It looks better.. not in a picture. Actually, it looks like I screwed it up at the top, but it's just because it gets kind of bunched at the needle.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Saturday, January 01, 2011

it's gonna be a happy new year.

What a freaking decade that was. My entire high school career, college, becoming seriously sick AND recovering from it, dad become seriously sick and his stem cell transplant, my brother's entire college career and living in NM, a cruise, every real trip I'd ever taken (which was not many..), my little cousin Devin's entire life, babies everywhere... In the bigger picture, um, 9/11? The war we've been fighting for 10 years, the Sox winning the WS... TWICE. Good Lord, a decade is a whole lifetime, it seems.


But 2010... it literally sealed it off for me. I mean, it wrapped that bitch up with a bow and everything. There are years that stand out, but seriously, what a way to pull it together. I feel like my life finally just came together in the past year. Well done, 2010. Well done.


The abc's of my year (mad friendship points if you can fill in the letters I couldn't):


adventure summer; not as adventurous as planned...
blizzard of '10?
cpa; life saver
donald, the; yeah, he's kind of on my side for 2011
elissa june haddad; the nicu miracle baby herself
frozen oranges; the semi-end to an era?
greg & mal's wedding <3
how i met your mother; the most quoted show of the year
ikea; i discovered it
jen warner; life saver
k
legen-- wait for it...
matzo ball '10
nicu crew; best non-blood family anyone could ever ask for
olym pen vacation; most successful runaway
paramore; my one and only concert this year (worth it)
quitting my job on a (desperate) whim
returning to my degree after 5 long years
sweatshirt bonfire; now that's closure
twilight rendering my $5 clearance rack shirt an $1100 ebay sale
u
vegetarianism; that was a fun month...
wrapping up the last 5 years... perfectly
x
...dary. legendary.
z


So it's 2011: the year of the Rubensteins. The number 11 has kind of been a weird pattern for our family.
New Years Resolutions are not my thing. I'm a bigger fan of listing out goals for the year and things I'd like to do/see. My biggest one for this year is to take more risks. I started a little right at the end of 2010; pushed myself to do things that terrified me (as trivial as they were) and it worked out pretty well. It won't always, but it's worth it when it does.


What do you hope to accomplish for 2011?

Sunday, December 05, 2010

Sunday, November 28, 2010

flannel sheets save heat money.

Frame & duvet cover from IKEA.
Plaid flannel sheets from Target (which, by the way, is definitely pronounced "Tar-get.") They're on sale for $15/ea, if you're into that.
King size flannel pillow case from Mom's linen closet. Those are free with biological discount. Black Friday special.

Now, to redecorate the rest of the room. That may have to wait for 2o11...